Ass vs Face vs Boobs

Last week I was walking with three of my pals; Skagen, Zucci and Attilla, talking about football with Attilla emotionally stating how Suarez would have to kiss his black, hairy- (i do not claim witness to this)- thutha(ass) before he could shake his hand. that's besides the point. As we went on with the football banter four beauties walked past and we needed not telling to turn and have a rear view.
Once out of sight a debate ensued on who was the better catch of the four,with each of us apparently having picked differently and basing it on the following:
Attilla- The one in the purple top for me. her ass is well curved and perfectly symetrical. I'd tap that thutha any time anywhere.
Skagen- Why would you overlook the one in the black mini? She has boobs you'd want to hold on to, pluck those nipples like a violin and caress them like you mixing dough!
Guanty- Guys,all those come after her looks and of course her hair. So you must have spotted the one in the green dress top. Any word I use to describe that jaw-dropping face will be cliche.
All this while, Zucci looked on as we argued which ranked first in judging how blessed a girl is and thus the big question; Ass, face or boobs? For Zucci, he is one who takes everything with moderation and settled for the one in a black dress..average thutha, average jugs, stunning face. In the end he too agreed with me,face comes first.

face

boobs

thutha

I have many reasons why I'd go for a gorgeous face first,one being that I wouldnt have to put another person's image while drilling her tunnel or worse still have to put a pillow over her face. Do not get me wrong, I love a good FEMALE thutha, every dick carrier does but then you just look at it, grind against it while you can even rest your hand on some       while walking. It's said those with good thutha and swollen hips give better sex. Agreed. But would you rather have that and have to put a gunia(sack) over her face? Yah,didn't think so either.
My take on boobs? First let me admit that those twins are my left hand's best friend, my right is just the adventurous one.(statistics by Mama Wambui). A good cleavage is a pleasant sight, boobs having a hard-on(oh! those nipples) even more mouth watering. Assuming a role as the chief boob for now,and thus addressing citizens,i mean boobizens, I'd like to urge my sister boobs, be nice and firm, do not sluck or sag. Be the envy of the non-boob species let them drool at the sight of you. So keep that spherical curvature,forever and always.
This evening as I put my legs apart to give karis some some air and type away my final say of the rank. FACE>BOOBS>ASS>none at all. How would you rank these three assets?

That clande thing...

for those who have read my 'ukojoleaji' post and have tried it this is for you to read:

so ukojoleaji is the ultimate slicing tactic and i know you will agree too when i say it's the best sober panty remover. it gets that girl who blurbs how good her dude is to put a welcome rug at her tunnel. in this instance you don't have to get rid of the dude, i mean if your ramnyaring has been commended then that should be auto.

And that's my issue wit amateur wakojoleaji. she officially becomes the clande, side-plate or simply another one among many. there be cases where the clande feels attached to you. you can't have that dude...RUN!! you owe no duty of care to her because she should have her dude for that. have this in mind cz if you also get attached remember- if she cheated WITH you she'll definately cheat ON you!

To all the clande's out there,if you have a fling it does not get to us, we hardly care cz we aint an item. so don't feel the guilt of having mukuyus get into your tunnel umpteen times. Its yours,and its not lyk ni sabuni. Being a clandeis simply a passing wind,and yes the breeze is good while it lasts,when it gets calm its simply on to the next one.

I have been likened to clandes and maybe you have been too so this should just smack you into reality; if it's being a clande now you can never be for keeps. At least enjoy the flings, clande moments, enjoy being the ugali saucer then get that one guy with a halo on his headto drop your feelings on. good luck with that though.

Simply my point is if you brand yourself cheapand easy to get and manipulate you'll forever be that. i miss the days when it was only men straying coz then you as a lady could just be too amazing to stray from. I miss the days when it was men chasing and sweating to get sme tunnel love,i look to the day getting some wont be too obvious. Dont be slutty,dont go tasting all mukuyus you can. keep your dignity. If you are a fling,men dont care once inside you.

But still,man being one of three species that has sex for pleasure(the others being dolphins and some apes) i would not blame anyone opting for a fuckas leisure. purely natural instinct.

Finally to express my envy for pigs,coz I know a 30 minute orgasm is one i wouldn't mind!! A-A-AWUOH!

Of random thoughts

random thinking

on new years i made a toast, a toast celebrating how this year would end. that's me simply being optimistic and not carrying 2011's soul with me. with that toast i am bound to make every moment one without regrets...and so far i must say, this is one beautiful year.
my pockets having survived January's rape attempts i embrace February,a month of love-come on who am i kidding?? a month of flings,one night escapades, random plot and generally a gear up to the rest of 2012. goodbye January,one down 11 more to go.
last year i made somewhat of a promise that 'karis' i.e. my young, talented bald friend below my belt- would go on leave. no getting any and just watching from the stands with his nuts friends. zucci my pal would bet i would definitely fail..why? apparently the hot weather is directly proportional to the secretion of pheromones hence there's no way karis would not see a dark tunnel soon. his being right or wrong....well hiyo ni siri ya karis,and mama wambui of course;)
so as i toil days away resisting temptation, makagery-mboiz wangu is having to solve tunnel simultaneous equations. did i lose you there? OK. taking the tunnel to be the fairer sex's warm hole and simultaneous being two...you should have figured it out by now. normally i would not be envious, but when you are having tunnels that make many mukuyus sing 'party don stop' ALL to yourself- then i salute you. in no way implying that makagery is a male trapper,he just plays his game smooth.
that brings me to having a word with all the players out there. we all know that not getting caught is usually the ultimate goal but,what defines the ultimate player? to me, he is one who even after getting caught gets to establish a truce between the girls and still getting a piece of them both!! i don't mean to say they will just agree to that cz they are cheap, no real player goes for easy catches,those are just flings. they agree because you should have given a taste of your mukuyu like none other.
P.S. 1) the author of this post is very faithful to his one and only mama wambui and is actually at the time
           very celibate.
P.S. 2) this article was drafted 5 years ago.